December 2011
1 tag
My Christmas day
3am
Me: -vomits-
9am
Me: -vomits-
Me: -opens presents-
Me: -goes to bed and sleeps for three hours-
Me: -Watches christmas movies on Ipod-
6pm
Me: -comes downstairs-
Dad: Don't worry, if you feel better there's some gammon in the fridge you can have!
Me: ...
Brother: She's a vegetarian, you nut.
Just now
Me: -eating a piece of dry toast, only thing I've eaten all day-
Pebbles: -begs-
Me: Good boy. -gives a piece-
Pebbles: -begs-
Me: No, no more.
Pebbles: -begs-
Me: ...
Pebbles: -begs-
Me: Fucking stop.
tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
tourist: oh you think you're clever???
new yorker: what
tourist: i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
new yorker: oh... oh god i'm so sor
tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole
when my sims sleep in the wrong bed
bappletree:
life-like-sims:
no you little dumbass I made your bedroom to specifically represent your personality why do you insist on sleeping there stop it at once young man you are a disappointment to this household
SO TRUE. I get so worked up and mad at them for sleeping in their child’s bed or vice versa.
When one parent shares a double bed with their child, and the other parent...
Stranger in a Strange Land: Bold What Applies to... →
I am a male.
I am a girl
I am shorter than 5’4.
I have many scars.
I tan easily. (only my arms)
I wish my hair was a different color.
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
I have a tattoo.
I want a tattoo.
I am self-conscious about my body.
I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
I have more than 2 piercings.
I have a piercing in a place other...
Guiltless grill? Is there another kind? →
lesaintdulys:
Ha, vegetarianism is such bullshit.
— ⚜☨
No, this article is such bullshit. How butthurt can someone get over one word in a restaurant menu? Click here to find out.
Also, the irony in this...
hellodoctorbuddha:
eti-twinkletoes:
...
Gonna go have a mini White Collar marathon!!
detectivesexymcbadass:
I love me some Matt Bomer
me and my friend’s plan for the evening.
1 tag
Everyone has six names.
1. Your Real name: Claire 2. Your detective name (Favorite color and favorite Animal): Purple Tiger 3. Your soap opera name (middle name and street you live on): Emma Gonville 4. Your Star wars name (first three letters of last name, first two of middle name, first two of first, last three of last): Walemclden 5. Superhero name (color of your shirt, first item to your immediate left): White Mug...
“When I see cages crammed with chickens from battery farms thrown on trucks like...”
– Georges Metanomski, a holocaust survivor who fought in the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising (via veganbabs)
